Hate Being Alive

HATE the way little things alter the way that I FEEL

FEELING hurt so deep that I just want to get a knife and cut out every inch of that PAIN

PAIN that`s so strong it overpowers my senses while allowing gallons of adrenaline to FLOW

FLOWING all over my body, creating an urge for me to hurt MYSELF

MYSELF being the only one who can truly understand the pain and hurt that`s INSIDE

INSIDE  there`s a mess of emotions that even I can`t organize or get a hold OF

OF course I am angry, of course I don`t care, what do people EXPECT

EXPECTING to wake up one day to find that this has just been a six year long NIGHTMARE

NIGHTMARES wake me up in the middle of the night that seem so real it takes me a few minutes to snap out of it and convince my mind OTHERWISE

OTHERWISE id go crazy because these thoughts in my mind can get so overwhelming sometimes it feels like it will never END

ENDING these feelings of anger, despair, pain, sadness and so much more is my biggest goal in LIFE

LIFE seems to be taking over ME

ME being the person that I see when I look into the mirror and HATE

HATE being the force that is driving me MAD

MAD that i am ALIVE

ALIVE is what i HATE